Cru vs Nerima RFC by Chris Ford

Coming off a rest week, and their first Shuto League game with a win against the Tokyo Doctors, Tokyo Crusaders Rugby Club faced off against Nerima on a beautiful Sunday afternoon at Inagi stadium.

Starting off the match on somewhat of a poor note, Nerimaa was immediately able to put up two tries against the Crusaders, a combination of lazy tackling by both the forwards and backs (not singling anyone out, but our guest sideline manager Matthew “I need an ambulance called because I have a boo boo” Sparrow pointed out someone’s whose name rhymes with Hank Laugherty was most notable to the point it was comical). After some quick rallying though from our fearless South African dictator and captain Brett Pentland-Smith, driving back Nermia almost immediately like a Zimbabwe Military Officer determined to overthrow a president, Mr. Smith put up back to back points with 1 successful conversion by Owen Morris.

Starting off the second half, the Crusaders came out looking like Stella in the second act of the critically acclaimed movie “How Stella got her grove Back” starring actress Whoopi Goldberg who has successfully won multiple Kids Choice awards in the early 90’s. Looking to redeem himself Hank… er I mean Frank Saffery put Nermia’s offensive line outs in a mental pretzel by stealing a line out armed with his man-child esq. athletic ability and superior height without even having to jump. To further add to the pressure, Owen Morris acting on pure genetic instinct mimicking his university years by relentlessly attacking the back door of (back of the scrum), and even completing a life long goal of double teaming a scrum half (and forcing turnovers) with assistance of Chris Ford. After a tough boot and rally, and more points put on the board by Brett Pentland-Smith our Captain following with the theme of Zimbabwe politics was handed a yellow card forcing forcing him out of office and the Crusaders to play a man down. Not to fear though, an identity crisis stricken player paralleling his personal life, Dom Summer who took it upon himself to start playing as a forward smashing through Nermia like a poor unsuspecting lady on a Friday night in Roppongi, followed by one last try by the human bowling ball Yasu followed by two successful conversions by Susumu, the Crusaders took the lead. Unfortunately a last ditch effort by Nermia, and the Crusaders defense looking like Jerry Lee Sysourath’s drinking stamina, the last 15 minutes of the match cost the Crusaders the win they were looking for.

Final score 31-47, game stats and awards are as follows:

Tries;
Brett (Owen conv.)
Brett
Brett
Dom (Susumu conv)
Yasu (Susumu conv)
MVP – Yasu
Best Player – Tim

3,2,1s
5pts – Brett
4pts – Owen
3pts – Yasu
2pts – Tim
1pt – Dom

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